So why is it called “From Wishing to Believing” you ask?! 

Because so often as desperate sensory parents, we put all our faith and hope into allllllllllll the things people suggest and we hope something will work. Well, I want to encourage us all to stop wishing for something to work, and start believing that with a plan (and support) we can take charge of our kiddos’ outcomes. 

I have spent years deep in the dark depths of all of my son’s diagnoses: ASD, SPD, ADHD, Anxiety Disorder and Depression. I have filled out all the questionnaires, checklists, and interview questions. I have run around to all the doctors, specialists, and therapies. I have joined all the parent FB and support groups. I have bought all the fidgets, supplements, and tools. 

And yet I was still struggling. He was still struggling. 

I mean STRU-GU-LING!!!!! 

I understood that all these things would take time to show a positive effect, and I also understood that this was a long game. But when you’re in the thick of it and feel like you can’t breathe some days, you need something now. You need to feel like YOU have control and aren’t just at the whim of all these other life rafts to save you and your child.

I also understand that the last thing we parents need is another thing to feel guilty, inadequate, or like a failure about. 

So in this blog you won’t hear what you “should” be doing, buying, or believing (other than believing that there is hope and answers). You won’t be judged for what you’re doing or not doing. 

My hope is to share my failures and successes (with a little rawness, potty mouth, and feistiness) so that: 

  • You know you’re not alone 
  • You might find something that helps you/your child 
  • You have one part of your day where you smile or laugh
  • You feel seen and heard in a way you don’t get elsewhere 
So check back here on those days when you need a specific sensory tip for your kid, like: tying their shoes, eating more foods, or cleaning their room. ….or just need to zone out on something other than your overwhelming day.

Hugs to you, fellow sensory parent!!

*Some posts may contain affiliate links to share products we use and love!
How to Tackle Your To Do List Without Getting Overwhelmed

Get Your To-Do List Out of Your Head and Done Without a Complicated Planner

You don’t have to be a type-A personality to have a to-do list that overtakes your life.  I think most of us nowadays constantly have to-dos swirling in our heads, weighing on us, and making us feel like we can’t ever get it all done.  

Although I’m not here to promise a way to finish your to-do list (I have literally had a running to-do list for years), I am going to share a way I’ve learned to make sure it doesn’t become overwhelming.  

If you’re anything like me, you are subconsciously running through all the things you have to do on the daily.  Your mind is always telling you what you need to get done (“don’t forget to make that doctor’s appointment, switch the laundry, get supplies for the school project…”).  And then at night (or any given down time), your mind can’t quiet down because you’re replaying all the things you still have to do, and still didn’t get done.  You feel overwhelmed, inadequate and hopeless.

And, of course, we’ve probably all seen the myriad of planners and notebooks on the market that are supposed to help with this, but I actually find using them more overwhelming and give me one more thing to feel inadequate about.  They are complex, time-consuming and I just can’t keep up with them.  

But I found a simple system that gets those nagging to-dos out of my head and helps me prioritize the ones that I really need to worry about and let go of the ones that aren’t as important.  All you need is a plain lined notebook (it helps if it's cute like this one!), a pen, and if you share my obsession with color coding, some highlighters.  ;-)

Step 1:  Brain Dump  

It seems obvious, but I mean it…write it down, ALL OF IT!  The only way to stop that nagging voice in your head is to literally get it out of there.   Take 15 minutes a week to sit down, and let all the to-dos flood from your brain to the paper..  Tell your mind, “Okay, give it to me..what are all the things I need to do?”.  Every one of them that pops up, write it down.  Yes, 

EVERY.  

SINGLE.  

ONE.  

Even the seemingly obvious ones that you know you have to do like put away the dishes.  If it is popping up in your mind, it is taking up your mental energy and we want that to stop.  It might feel silly to write all of them out, but trust me, getting them out on paper is the first important step to ending the overwhelm.

Step 2:  Prioritize

This is my favorite part…my highlighter friends get to come out of hiding and do their job!  Now, you don’t need highlighters for this step, and can simply use a 1-3 number system (but highlighters are so fun!!!).

You are going to look back over the long list you just created and you’re going to prioritize them using a scale based on “timely importance”.  Ask yourself, “What is the most crucial thing timewise that has to get done today or something bad will happen.  Like, if you don’t do this thing, there will be tangible, negative repercussions (I could lose my job, credit rating goes down, etc).  It sounds dramatic, but this really helped me realize that not many things are really as urgent as my brain was making them out to be.  When you do find those level 1 items on your list, you’re going to mark them as such, either putting a “1” next to them, or my personal favorite, a red (or pink) highlighter right over the top.  I usually end up only have 2-5 red items, if that.  

Then you’ll look back over your list, grab your blue highlighter and ask yourself, “what are things that are nagging at me but realistically don’t have any timeframe for getting done?”  These are items that are a level 3 that can be put on ice (hence the blue highlighter) for a while.  Sure, it’d be nice to get them done, but they can wait.  Doing this part is probably the most satisfying for me.  When I see all that blue my little anxious heart just breathes a sigh of relief knowing I don’t have to rush to these ones.  

And then lastly, you’ll look back over your list and look for level 2 items.  These are things that have a timeline, but aren’t urgent for today.  They are usually the things like laundry, dishes, yard cleanup, etc.  They need to get done, they are weighing on you, but they aren’t dire for life to continue.  I grab my yellow highlighter and strike away (or write a #2).  This is the bulk of my list, usually 70% of my items are yellow.  
 

Step 3:  Start getting the shit done!

Start with your red (#1) items and do them.  It’s that simple.  Once you knock those out,  you might find you’re on a roll and can move on to some yellows.  You’ll be surprised how quickly you can move through these items when they’re in black and white (or red, yellow and blue!).  Oh, and don’t forget to mark them off when done.  This might be the most rewarding feeling in the world…crossing things off your to-do list.  I like to put a big ole’ scribble 
through the item so I can still see what the item was that I tackled.  But you might like fully making it vanish with lots of scribbles or even a black marker so it’s fully “gone”.  Whatever way helps you celebrate the accomplishment of getting things done.

Once I started implementing this system, my overwhelm literally went away.  And I actually started looking forward to crossing things off my list instead of dreading it.  I’ll be honest, I don’t use this system every day for every item I have to get done.  I only break this system out when I feel myself getting overwhelmed, losing sleep, or spinning out over all the things in my life I need to do.  
 

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